Last Saturday, I ran the longest race I have run to date. This 5-mile race was just one more step in the training plan I have in place for the half marathon I will be running in October. I looked forward to seeing how I would react to racing a longer distance than the 5K’s I had run in the past.
Since my training schedule called for an 8-mile long run on the weekend, I began my day with a 3-mile easy run. It made me a little nervous that I wouldn’t have enough energy left for the actual race but by the time I stepped up to the start line, I felt confident and prepared to run the additional 5 miles. The course was fairly flat and I planned on averaging around 10:04 per mile, something I had done during a tempo run earlier in the week.
“This is a training run. It’s not about the time,” I kept saying to myself before we took off from the start. “Run your own race.” (I talk to myself quite a bit when I run; one of the downfalls of not running with an iPod!)
There was the usual jockeying for position after the start gun but I finally settled in, set my sites on the back of the runner in front of me and ran. I even passed a few people. When I hit mile 3, which was the first distance marker in the race, I looked at my watch: 28 minutes and change! I distinctly remember thinking “Holy cow, that can’t be right!” I was running faster than my planned 10:04 per mile but I still felt strong. At mile 4, I again checked my watch. I was maintaining my faster pace!
I ended up running the 5 miles in 48:07, averaging a 9:37/mile. This was a PR for me and I was so excited to see that I had not only taken about 3 seconds off my last 5K mile pace but I had maintained that pace for almost 2 additional miles, while having run 3 miles before the race even began! I couldn’t wait to see where I fell in the standings.
I was at my parent’s house later in the day and I told my dad that although the results had not yet been posted, I figured I had finished somewhere in the middle of the pack. He reminded me that it is not really about where you finish in the standings—at least not at the point where I am in my running endeavors—but how you do according to your own goals. And I agreed with him, all the while secretly anticipating the posting of the results.
The results were posted by Monday morning and the euphoria that had carried me through the weekend was instantly deflated. I had finished 7th out of eleven runners in my age group (40-49). If the age groups had been broken down to the more typical grouping of 45-49, I would have placed second to last. Overall, I had placed 76th out of 107. I was not in the middle of the pack—I was in the bottom of the pack. To make matters worse, a woman three years older than me had won my division, averaging a 7:57 per mile pace. I felt horrible—I felt slow—I felt disappointed in myself. The sense of achievement I had felt earlier vanished. I wont’ lie, I complained a little, even felt a little sorry for myself.
And then I remembered what my dad had said about running really being about meeting or exceeding the goals you have set for yourself. It is an individual sport and in the end, you are competing against yourself. I thought about what my running goals are for this season: run a half marathon, run a 9:30 mile, keep a regular training schedule. The half is coming up on October 17th and I am right on schedule with my training. I am aiming for finishing in two and a half hours or less and this should actually be possible if I stay on track in my training and don’t get injured. And I am almost down to that 9:30 per mile goal, only seven seconds to go! Before the season’s end, I hope to be there.
When I was a kid and I didn’t do as well on something as I thought I should have, I remember my parents asking me if I had tried my hardest and best. If I had tried my best and had worked hard toward my goal, then I could take comfort in my efforts. I have said the same to my daughter about goals she has set for herself. When I think about how I felt as I crossed the finish line on Saturday, the 48:07 glowing on the timer, I knew I had dug deep. I had put it all out there, complete with a finishing kick.
I’m back to being thrilled with my performance on Saturday. I may not be the fastest runner out there but I am constantly moving toward my goals to become a better runner. However, if I can maintain my current pace by the time I am in the 60-69 age group, wow, then I’ll be fast!
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